He loathed himself with everything that he had. Reluctantly, he crawled back into his bed and the warm that radiated off her calmed his raging heart a little. She would probably hit him on the head for being ‘stupid’. He knew that Lucy would probably get mad at him if she was awake right now. So, it tore him up inside that he wasn’t enough for her. Lucy took his breath away, and she melted away his anxieties and doubts. Lucy deserved a man who was wholeheartedly good who didn’t have a creeping darkness within him and someone who didn’t attempt to murder her. He replayed the words in his head like a mantra, desperately trying to stop himself from spiralling into the emptiness. She often told him, “You are not your future self, you’re you.” But he struggled to believe it. He stared at her sleeping form and he felt her throat choke up. He would rather endure endless torture than hurt his beloved. If that was what the future held, then he’d rather die. Why did the future him want to end her life so bad. Guilt gnawed at his heart as he turned his head to the open door that led to his bedroom.
There was no way to change this, Rogue was no fool - you cannot change what is meant to be. That was the inevitable future and it haunted him. Rogue stared at his dishevelled reflection in the mirror.īlank eyes stared back at him and he hated it. He saw Future Rogue in front of him, it was almost taunting.
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